Impulse n.
1. a sudden strong and unreflective urge or desire to act
2. A driving or motivating force; an impetus
3. Waneisha
Lately I’ve been trying to analyze my thoughts and actions more i.e be more self aware. In doing so I’ve found a rather “alarming” quality (like all the rest of them honestly) that I hadn’t paid much attention to before. I’m back and forth with trying to see if it’s a good trait or a bad one and I end up over analyzing myself and my actions. Okay so boom, sometimes I have things come up where I have to figure out if I’m coming or going in .2 seconds and so I make a decision and prepare for the reward or consequences. Then there’s me not being patient and literally making a decision to control my situation and in turn I might be messing it up – and just like that my eyes were opened to see when my impulse can be a good or bad thing.
The other day I had a talk with a good friend of mine about my impulsive decisions. I explained that I was trying to make less of these and be more patient and make well thought out moves instead of just moving on a whim. The only reason I started thinking of my impulse in a negative light is because I read somewhere that it could be linked to a mental disorder and ever since I started working in mental health, I’ve tried to be more aware of my own mental and notice the signs. Now I feel like my sudden urges to act could be a sign that I need to take note of. I don’t claim to have the best mental health but I sure don’t have the worst. I take self care seriously and make sure to do things that help protect my peace that I’ve worked so hard to gain. So am I just being too cautious? My friend claimed that these moves just may work best for me overall. When I sit and think on something too long I get frustrated and then even more confused on what to do next. If I move off of impulse of something that may feel right, I tend to come out good more than bad.
So maybe the way I act on driving forces about certain things isn’t a bad thing. I’m not harming anybody else or myself in doing these; I’m always trying to set myself up for something better with my moves. When I sit and overthink then I end up being stagnant and feeling incomplete. My mind can’t process being one place for too long. But when I let my mind move quickly as it tends to do, I feel better about my decision because I’ve thought it out and feel confident. Maybe it’s not such a bad thing after all….
CheckMyLipss 
This was a great expression of your thoughts. I too can be very impulsive about my decisions, thoughts and actions. I have those internal thoughts all the time about what my impulse means. I hear it all the time, “You never stay put” or “You’re always in the go.” For me, most of the times those are impulsive moves to go travel or see friends and family. And might I add they are SUPER last minute. But I think about it like this: If it makes me happy and it is not hurting me or anyone else, then that’s that. I feel like we both know when an important decision needs to be made, we sit our impulsive thoughts somewhere else and think logically. Seriously thanks for sharing! I felt seen in this piece so thank you! 💙
LikeLiked by 1 person
Omg I’m glad you were able to connect with what I was saying. I hate overthinking myself too much but in writing this I was able to think through and see exactly what you said: my actions aren’t hurting myself or anybody else so there’s no harm in the way I think or move. Thank you for the support!
LikeLike